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“形同路人”，這個詞語很是感傷。光是路人很正常，地球那么多人，中國那么多人，就算根據“六度空間”理論，“路人”也還是一個非常龐大的數字，人的一生畢竟短暫，能認識的人的個數總是有限的。傷就傷在“形同”二字上。明明不是，明明曾經有過這樣那樣或千絲萬縷或斷斷續續或天作之合的聯繫，最後，卻終因一個看似強大的、不可抗的因素，就這么輕而易舉的猶如捻滅燈芯般地──不認識了。

現代工業文明總帶給我們，至少是我，一種生冷的陌生，時不時的，還夾雜著一點絕望。於這種生冷的絕望中，塞入“路人”這一冷漠的實體名詞，并增之以“形同”的前綴，就不能不說是一場災難了。當然了，無論是主體還是受體，都只是相對某些人而言。

夫年少者，縱未嘗謀面，然唯志同，亦非路人也。都曰“年少輕狂”。年少，便是輕狂的資本。然着有些人偏偏不用，於是霜氣起，而橫秋。只是，又有幾個生就甘愿舍輕狂而就橫秋呢？於少年，但聞如“時無英雄，使豎子成名”、“我被瘋狂的時代鞭打后，用一種對我周圍每個人來說是最殘酷的方式進行寫作”此類話語者，不動容者誰？然彼“胸懷大志，腹有良謀。有包藏宇宙之機，吞吐天地之志”者，大多只落得個“懷抱利器，鬱鬱適茲土”的無涯境地。如不是現實的殘酷，又有幾個橫秋者會是少年呢？只有英雄方能惜英雄——“只有一棵樹才能讀懂另一棵樹的年輪，只有一个天才才能讀懂另一个天才的夢想”。——但夫英雄者，尚有英雄惜之！

皆謂“物傷其類”。然英雄傷英雄非人間至傷。一位路人說過

英雄如何,庶民又当如何呢…那些人,胸载丘壑的,无论是已经故去还是依旧掩映在平平之中的,只要一直有人与他们同在就可以拂去憾意的…，…只是曲高和寡,终难成音才最是遗憾…

當曾經的和曲者，一個一個的成為“路人”；當一曲奏畢，環顧四周，睥睨宇內，竟無人愿和，甚至無人能和時，此等悲傷，此等慘烈，更，與何人說？

All are futility…

What efforts ever made exchanged for,

Is just whilom disappointement…

Whilom lose…

Whilom failure…

Even disappontment for ever-

Lose for ever-

And failure for ever…

It is suggested that I had used to be,

Or were in the dawn,

Still that’s(this is) just timeless dawn,

if so,

It’s better to entomb myself——

In the endless nights…

I find that I still can’t recover from her leaving. I can’t understand why she left me, I can’t understand why do I cares so much about her, would I fall in love with her or would she fall in love with me?…I don’t know. The only thing I exactly know is she left, she did leave!

I have no feeling when I am reading now, I lost the sense of words, the sense of the world, and even the sense of my ego. I am not I was. I can’t perform the best of myself. I just wanna  prevent myself from behaving the worst.

When reviewing my history since June, 2007, I feel I were dreaming , but what a terrible dream!

As the principle "with similarity, with dissolubility"(相似相溶), I can’t accept (not adjust to )my surroundings, I have my own appeals and I will stick and be loyal to them. Different believes, little discussions(道不同，不相为谋). I won’t and couldn’t have a good or even normal communication with them so that I won’t be assimilated. In this "campus", I have no one to share interests, no one to discuss, no one to laugh with.

What I often say is:" I’ve lost." Why? Because the so-called "college" is too small while my heart is too big, I am looking for my heart in the "campus"– of course, I can’t find it.

She have not pay attention to me for almost 2 days. I don’t know what to do. Maybe I’ve lost her.

It rained today which sent me a bad mood even worse than yesterday. I’m so depressed that I do not wanna do anything and see or talk to anyone.

But I feel lonely because no one sms or qq me INITIATIVELY except 10086 or trash messages. No one take cares of me except my parents.

I can’t understand why ZQq left me till now. I’ve found that after her left, I changed a lot. I can’t say clearly what she means to me.

But now it seems that I will lost another good girl. I don’t know… and I can’t avoid their leaving.